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ringfinger
Retired Number
Joined: 08 Oct 2013
Posts: 29418
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 Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2014 8:14 am Post subject: |
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| ChefLinda wrote: | | ringfinger wrote: | | DaMuleRules wrote: | | ChefLinda wrote: | | ringfinger wrote: | | ChefLinda wrote: | | ringfinger wrote: | | Any form of discipline can be taken too far. If you ground your kid for 2 weeks without food or water, that is abuse. Thus, grounding is abuse, right? |
It's the "without food or water" part that's abuse. Grounding your kid (provided they still attend school as usual) for legitimate reasons for 2 weeks is not abuse. |
What's wrong with withholding food and/or water? If you only do it for an hour, that's not abuse is it?
A one week timeout is abuse as well. Thus, timeouts are abuse. Yeah? Or can we agree there are varying shades of gray at play here. |
You said for "2 weeks" of no food and water and now you're saying one hour.
Now you just threw in a new topic of "a one week timeout" when no one said anything about a "one week timeout."
Red herrings and moving goal posts don't interest me. |
That's SOP for ringfinger, which is why some of us no longer engage him. |
What does your post have to do with the thread topic? Let's keep it on topic instead of baiting type posts -- cool?
I just have a problem with what I call "internet arguing". It's when people go to extremes and then act as if they genuinely feel strong about something. You have them on both sides. You have the people who advocate abuse because they they liked it and then you have people who think a smack on the butt deserves jail time.
It's silly internet arguing comments such as "hitting is hitting". Not all hitting is violent. But that's internet arguing at its finest. And inevitably, since we can't all be reasonable, we'll have to deconstruct the definition of hitting since we can't seem to differentiate between hitting a kid in the face with a sledgehammer and softly hitting him on the butt with an open hand. Hitting is hitting after all right?
No. |
No one said a smack on the butt deserved jail time. It's impossible to make a list here of everything that is or isn't abuse. I actually posted a couple of links a few pages back that gave pretty good guidelines for what constitutes physical abuse. If it's details you want, you probably would have taken the time to read them.
Adults can also abuse children without laying a hand on them. Loud, drunk, yelling screaming bullies who hurl berating insults at a child can do a great deal of harm.
There aren't really "two sides" to this. Law enforcement, courts, therapists, sociologists and science says the type of corporal punishment that constitutes child abuse is wrong, against the law, damaging and counterproductive. The so-called "other" side are the people who deny the collective wisdom of all of the experts above. That's not the "other" side. That's denial. |
Totally agree with your second point that adults can abuse children without even touching them. Verbal abuse can be equally damaging as physical abuse, but that doesn't mean we should talk to, or even raise our voice at our children. It's about understanding where the line is drawn.
I just don't like broad sweeping generalizations that all hitting is bad. Hitting can be soft, hitting can be hard. But forms of hitting can be also be effective when applied appropriately.
I think we can all agree that what AP did is crossing that line and on that point I do not disagree. |
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jodeke
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Joined: 17 Nov 2007
Posts: 67702
Location: In a world where admitting to not knowing something is considered a great way to learn.
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| Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2014 8:57 am Post subject: |
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Funny, I could show my daughter a belt and it would be enough to cause a change in attitude. I think I actually hit her twice. Never on the buttocks, always on the calfs, females have sensitive organs in the buttocks area.
My son got a spanking, he hated it. I'd only hit him 4 maybe 5 times. I'd have him lie on his bed and hold onto his pillow. I'd smack him on the butt with a wide belt, not hard enough to whelp but hard enough to inflict pain. Then I'd have him sit up and we'd talk about his wrong. Lie him down, smack him, sit him up, talk to him. Around the third smack he'd say, OK Daddy, I understand. Took about 20 minutes.
Bye the By Adrian Peterson has been deactivated, won't play today against the New England Patriots. Unlike Rice, he'll still be paid.
_________________
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves. |
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ChefLinda
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Joined: 20 Sep 2006
Posts: 24166
Location: Boston
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| Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2014 9:19 am Post subject: |
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^^^I find that completely nauseating and repulsive. Moreso that you don't see anything wrong with it and seem to think it was a-okay because it worked. Just appalling.
At this point, as a Moderator, I feel compelled to continue to point out how wrong this is because my silence on the subject would be to condone it.
I might lock this thread if only to save some you from further embarrassing yourselves. If this were being revealed in real time, you would also be subjecting yourselves to report for child abuse and possible arrest. I'm sure Adrian Peterson thought what he did was just fine and dandy too. |
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