|
| View previous topic :: View next topic |
| Author |
Message |
non-player zealot
Franchise Player
Joined: 05 Nov 2007
Posts: 21365
|
 Posted: Thu Nov 20, 2014 7:31 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| KobeBryantCliffordBrown wrote: | We're in a state of cultural flux and well meaning people are caught in the middle. Intent means a lot and the outrage at D12 and AP is just an example of people trying jumping on a bandwagon in order to make themselves feel better.
Corporal punishment was thought for many, many years to be the way to show your child the love of not allowing them to go out and be killed by acting up in public. |
Bo Jackson was most definitely a mama's boy and was devastated by her death and credited all of his success to her raising him and his sibs by herself, but he's got stories about what he would get if he screwed up, and he did a lot. He was big kid, too, so not easy to physically intimidate, but she managed to. He said she told him to do something while he was busy with a previous chore and he replied, "I can't do two things at a ti...(BAM!)" He didn't even get the complaint out of his mouth before she hit him on the head with an implement. He said his mother showed him a revolver once and told him, "if you run, I got somethin that'll catch you." She locked him outside all night one time for coming home late. Cords, belts, switches, any blunt instrument on hand, etc. Shh, remember the show What's Happening? Raj and Dee were in constant fear of being whipped by their mother. That was a comedy angle in the 70s, as was Ralph Cramden saying, "To da MOON, Alice!!" in the 50s. Imagine anyone laughing at either thing today.
I've received that sh from time to time too. I also remember being hit with a belt, buckle end. My take is that that kind of punishment is antiquated in this day and age. Cultural points of view evolve beyond your personal memories of the way things were. I think people often misconceive the past as "good times" or times that were culturally superior to the current standards. I believe that misconception extends to corporal punishment. People who've received it as kids and believe it didn't negatively impact them (or that it actually helped them to tread on the right track to adulthood) don't stop to consider that it may not even be relevant to either thing. It may just mean that you got your ass whipped as a kid.
It's a hard thing for adults who had to experience it to accept that it didn't at least have a positive effect; that it was ultimately done out of love. Hard to accept it was simply done in vain. It's finding a way to absolve your parent of something you now feel is wrong by blaming your child self and construing the act as love. Meanwhile, the same people know that children are helpless and are destined to make mistakes. The two things don't mesh. Blaming yourself as a child for a mistake that got you whipped while at the same time, you would hesitate to blame some other child for a mistake.
I've watched too much Sop's.  Melfi was telling Ton' he was blaming himself for his mother trying to have him whacked and he exploded and got in her face because he didn't wanna accept it.
_________________
GOAT MAGIC REEL
SEDALE TRIBUTE
EDDIE DONX! |
|
| Back to top |
|
 |
KobeBryantCliffordBrown
Star Player
Joined: 28 Apr 2008
Posts: 6429
|
| Posted: Thu Nov 20, 2014 7:59 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| non-player zealot wrote: | | KobeBryantCliffordBrown wrote: | We're in a state of cultural flux and well meaning people are caught in the middle. Intent means a lot and the outrage at D12 and AP is just an example of people trying jumping on a bandwagon in order to make themselves feel better.
Corporal punishment was thought for many, many years to be the way to show your child the love of not allowing them to go out and be killed by acting up in public. |
Bo Jackson was most definitely a mama's boy and was devastated by her death and credited all of his success to her raising him and his sibs by herself, but he's got stories about what he would get if he screwed up, and he did a lot. He was big kid, too, so not easy to physically intimidate, but she managed to. He said she told him to do something while he was busy with a previous chore and he replied, "I can't do two things at a ti...(BAM!)" He didn't even get the complaint out of his mouth before she hit him on the head with an implement. He said his mother showed him a revolver once and told him, "if you run, I got somethin that'll catch you." She locked him outside all night one time for coming home late. Cords, belts, switches, any blunt instrument on hand, etc. Shh, remember the show What's Happening? Raj and Dee were in constant fear of being whipped by their mother. That was a comedy angle in the 70s, as was Ralph Cramden saying, "To da MOON, Alice!!" in the 50s. Imagine anyone laughing at either thing today.
I've received that sh from time to time too. I also remember being hit with a belt, buckle end. My take is that that kind of punishment is antiquated in this day and age. Cultural points of view evolve beyond your personal memories of the way things were. I think people often misconceive the past as "good times" or times that were culturally superior to the current standards. I believe that misconception extends to corporal punishment. People who've received it as kids and believe it didn't negatively impact them (or that it actually helped them to tread on the right track to adulthood) don't stop to consider that it may not even be relevant to either thing. It may just mean that you got your ass whipped as a kid.
It's a hard thing for adults who had to experience it to accept that it didn't at least have a positive effect; that it was ultimately done out of love. Hard to accept it was simply done in vain. It's finding a way to absolve your parent of something you now feel is wrong by blaming your child self and construing the act as love. Meanwhile, the same people know that children are helpless and are destined to make mistakes. The two things don't mesh. Blaming yourself as a child for a mistake that got you whipped while at the same time, you would hesitate to blame some other child for a mistake.
I've watched too much Sop's. Melfi was telling Ton' he was blaming himself for his mother trying to have him whacked and he exploded and got in her face because he didn't wanna accept it. |
Lock Thread. Beautiful, insightful post NPZ.
_________________
“It took many years of vomiting up all the filth I’d been taught about myself, and half-believed, before I was able to walk on the earth as though I had a right to be here.”
― James Baldwin, Collected Essays |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
K28
Franchise Player
Joined: 29 Nov 2012
Posts: 10038
|
| Posted: Thu Nov 20, 2014 8:25 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| s_habe wrote: | | kray28_ wrote: | LOL...using a belt on your kid is not child abuse. It's much needed..especially with the current generation of delinquent youth.
I am no Dwight fan (as the record will attest)...but is bothers me when other people decide to chime in and tell parents how to discipline their kids.
That's up to the parent. And yes, sometimes corporal punishment is needed.
My wife and I just shake our heads at how kids that my daughter goes to school with open disrespect their parents.
1. One girl told her mom to shut up in front of other parents.
2. Another one decided to call his mom a "(bleep)", and threw a tantrum.
3. Yet another, told her parents "she hated them and to (bleep) off".
These are middle schoolers and no their parents don't spank them. |
What you describe is bad parenting. True. But if these parents used spanking, they'd be even worse.
A good parent manages without spanking. There are other ways to make the child understand what he/she did wrong.
A bad parent may have no idea how to treat the child. And then reverses to spanking. But that does not make the parenting suddenly better. It (almost) never does. A bad parent is still a bad parent and in the next day will make all the same mistakes again.
There is just no excuse to spanking. Shows only lack of communication skills. |
Who are you to tell me what is good/bad parenting? Frankly, you sound quite clueless to the point where I doubt you actually have kids. Kids are extremely difficult to manage...even the well behaved ones. If you think "communication" is the answer to discipline and obedience, you're delusional.
If you do actually have kids, I feel for them, and the horrible wakeup call they're going to get when they go into the real world. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
City_Dawg
Retired Number
Joined: 14 Jul 2006
Posts: 46878
Location: Coming soon and striking at your borders.
|
| Posted: Thu Nov 20, 2014 10:17 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| vanexelent wrote: | | GoldenThroat wrote: | I think it's important to distinguish between ignorance and malice when punishing people like Howard and Peterson. I am vehemently against violence against children that's justified under the specious pretense of "loving them" or "teaching them". I do not believe, however, that guys like Peterson or Howard do this with malice. Peterson, for example, told the police exactly what he did. He didn't attempt to cover it up, because he didn't think it was wrong.
It is my opinion that this mentality is definitely more pervasive in minority households, both in my experience growing up in a Puerto Rican household, and in coaching Mexican-American, Central-American, and African-American kids in South Central LA. Whopping your kids actually has positive connotation, at least in my experience. It's your attempt to teach them right from wrong, although I disagree that it's a survival mechanism these days, as KBCB asserts.
It's a WOEFULLY flawed mentality that needs to change, but I think that education is a more effective and appropriate solution than punishment. |
It would help if their fathers were actually around and slept in the same house. Howard and Peterson both have multiple kids around the country, with multiple women. They most likely see them a handful of times, if ever.
We live in a time when 72% of blacks come from a single parent household. 72%! Of course kids are going to act out when there isn't anyone to show them what's right or wrong. And of course their mothers, or grand mothers or whoever is in their lives are going to take more drastic measures to keep them in line. So, how about these guys just keep their pants zipped up or actually stick around after they bring a kid into this work? |
When i was elementary in school, my friends would be shocked if we met someone who lived with both parents. We just just figured living with one parent was the norm. 
_________________
*sighs*
!... |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Shaber
Star Player
Joined: 12 Mar 2006
Posts: 3732
Location: The other side
|
| Posted: Thu Nov 20, 2014 11:23 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| kray28_ wrote: | | s_habe wrote: | | kray28_ wrote: | LOL...using a belt on your kid is not child abuse. It's much needed..especially with the current generation of delinquent youth.
I am no Dwight fan (as the record will attest)...but is bothers me when other people decide to chime in and tell parents how to discipline their kids.
That's up to the parent. And yes, sometimes corporal punishment is needed.
My wife and I just shake our heads at how kids that my daughter goes to school with open disrespect their parents.
1. One girl told her mom to shut up in front of other parents.
2. Another one decided to call his mom a "(bleep)", and threw a tantrum.
3. Yet another, told her parents "she hated them and to (bleep) off".
These are middle schoolers and no their parents don't spank them. |
What you describe is bad parenting. True. But if these parents used spanking, they'd be even worse.
A good parent manages without spanking. There are other ways to make the child understand what he/she did wrong.
A bad parent may have no idea how to treat the child. And then reverses to spanking. But that does not make the parenting suddenly better. It (almost) never does. A bad parent is still a bad parent and in the next day will make all the same mistakes again.
There is just no excuse to spanking. Shows only lack of communication skills. |
Who are you to tell me what is good/bad parenting? Frankly, you sound quite clueless to the point where I doubt you actually have kids. Kids are extremely difficult to manage...even the well behaved ones. If you think "communication" is the answer to discipline and obedience, you're delusional.
If you do actually have kids, I feel for them, and the horrible wakeup call they're going to get when they go into the real world. |
Thank you for worrying for my kids! They are doing quite fine.
And a big thank you for answering my arguments with a personal attack!
That serves very nicely as a n example of what I was talking about. Some parents are not able to explain what is the essence of misbehavior to their children and revert to beating instead. There are arguments which may lead to understanding and then there is violence which mostly leads only to fear. The latter is hardly the best way to support any learning at all.
_________________
.
Lakers depth chart
PG Johnson / Goodrich
SG Bryant / West / Scott
SF Baylor / Worthy / Cooper
PF Mikkelsen / Hairston / McAdoo / Gasol
C Chamberlain / Abdul-Jabbar / O'Neal / Mikan |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Cutheon
Franchise Player
Joined: 10 Jul 2009
Posts: 12161
Location: Bay Area
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 21, 2014 7:59 am Post subject: |
|
|
| non-player zealot wrote: | | KobeBryantCliffordBrown wrote: | We're in a state of cultural flux and well meaning people are caught in the middle. Intent means a lot and the outrage at D12 and AP is just an example of people trying jumping on a bandwagon in order to make themselves feel better.
Corporal punishment was thought for many, many years to be the way to show your child the love of not allowing them to go out and be killed by acting up in public. |
Bo Jackson was most definitely a mama's boy and was devastated by her death and credited all of his success to her raising him and his sibs by herself, but he's got stories about what he would get if he screwed up, and he did a lot. He was big kid, too, so not easy to physically intimidate, but she managed to. He said she told him to do something while he was busy with a previous chore and he replied, "I can't do two things at a ti...(BAM!)" He didn't even get the complaint out of his mouth before she hit him on the head with an implement. He said his mother showed him a revolver once and told him, "if you run, I got somethin that'll catch you." She locked him outside all night one time for coming home late. Cords, belts, switches, any blunt instrument on hand, etc. Shh, remember the show What's Happening? Raj and Dee were in constant fear of being whipped by their mother. That was a comedy angle in the 70s, as was Ralph Cramden saying, "To da MOON, Alice!!" in the 50s. Imagine anyone laughing at either thing today.
I've received that sh from time to time too. I also remember being hit with a belt, buckle end. My take is that that kind of punishment is antiquated in this day and age. Cultural points of view evolve beyond your personal memories of the way things were. I think people often misconceive the past as "good times" or times that were culturally superior to the current standards. I believe that misconception extends to corporal punishment. People who've received it as kids and believe it didn't negatively impact them (or that it actually helped them to tread on the right track to adulthood) don't stop to consider that it may not even be relevant to either thing. It may just mean that you got your ass whipped as a kid.
It's a hard thing for adults who had to experience it to accept that it didn't at least have a positive effect; that it was ultimately done out of love. Hard to accept it was simply done in vain. It's finding a way to absolve your parent of something you now feel is wrong by blaming your child self and construing the act as love. Meanwhile, the same people know that children are helpless and are destined to make mistakes. The two things don't mesh. Blaming yourself as a child for a mistake that got you whipped while at the same time, you would hesitate to blame some other child for a mistake.
I've watched too much Sop's. Melfi was telling Ton' he was blaming himself for his mother trying to have him whacked and he exploded and got in her face because he didn't wanna accept it. |
Not only are all of your posts gold, but you somehow always manage to tie in a Soprano's reference...you. are. the. man!  |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
angrypuppy
Retired Number
Joined: 13 Apr 2001
Posts: 32754
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 21, 2014 8:36 am Post subject: |
|
|
| non-player zealot wrote: | | KobeBryantCliffordBrown wrote: | We're in a state of cultural flux and well meaning people are caught in the middle. Intent means a lot and the outrage at D12 and AP is just an example of people trying jumping on a bandwagon in order to make themselves feel better.
Corporal punishment was thought for many, many years to be the way to show your child the love of not allowing them to go out and be killed by acting up in public. |
Bo Jackson was most definitely a mama's boy and was devastated by her death and credited all of his success to her raising him and his sibs by herself, but he's got stories about what he would get if he screwed up, and he did a lot. He was big kid, too, so not easy to physically intimidate, but she managed to. He said she told him to do something while he was busy with a previous chore and he replied, "I can't do two things at a ti...(BAM!)" He didn't even get the complaint out of his mouth before she hit him on the head with an implement. He said his mother showed him a revolver once and told him, "if you run, I got somethin that'll catch you." She locked him outside all night one time for coming home late. Cords, belts, switches, any blunt instrument on hand, etc. Shh, remember the show What's Happening? Raj and Dee were in constant fear of being whipped by their mother. That was a comedy angle in the 70s, as was Ralph Cramden saying, "To da MOON, Alice!!" in the 50s. Imagine anyone laughing at either thing today.
I've received that sh from time to time too. I also remember being hit with a belt, buckle end. My take is that that kind of punishment is antiquated in this day and age. Cultural points of view evolve beyond your personal memories of the way things were. I think people often misconceive the past as "good times" or times that were culturally superior to the current standards. I believe that misconception extends to corporal punishment. People who've received it as kids and believe it didn't negatively impact them (or that it actually helped them to tread on the right track to adulthood) don't stop to consider that it may not even be relevant to either thing. It may just mean that you got your ass whipped as a kid.
It's a hard thing for adults who had to experience it to accept that it didn't at least have a positive effect; that it was ultimately done out of love. Hard to accept it was simply done in vain. It's finding a way to absolve your parent of something you now feel is wrong by blaming your child self and construing the act as love. Meanwhile, the same people know that children are helpless and are destined to make mistakes. The two things don't mesh. Blaming yourself as a child for a mistake that got you whipped while at the same time, you would hesitate to blame some other child for a mistake.
I've watched too much Sop's. Melfi was telling Ton' he was blaming himself for his mother trying to have him whacked and he exploded and got in her face because he didn't wanna accept it. |
Severe corporal punishment is child abuse. Sure there might be times that a child is severely beaten and rationalized as an act of love, but I am convinced that the vast majority of time that whenever a child is severely beaten it is due to the parent being incompetent, frustrated or intoxicated. I'm not going to discuss Dwight's parenting skills, but they probably are not as proficient as his ability to procreate. Thus I wouldn't conflate Dwight beating a child with the buckle end of a belt with the emotion of love.
His ass should be in jail if he committed this act. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Kobeling
Sixth Man
Joined: 20 Nov 2014
Posts: 47
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 21, 2014 10:11 am Post subject: |
|
|
| angrypuppy wrote: | | non-player zealot wrote: | | KobeBryantCliffordBrown wrote: | We're in a state of cultural flux and well meaning people are caught in the middle. Intent means a lot and the outrage at D12 and AP is just an example of people trying jumping on a bandwagon in order to make themselves feel better.
Corporal punishment was thought for many, many years to be the way to show your child the love of not allowing them to go out and be killed by acting up in public. |
Bo Jackson was most definitely a mama's boy and was devastated by her death and credited all of his success to her raising him and his sibs by herself, but he's got stories about what he would get if he screwed up, and he did a lot. He was big kid, too, so not easy to physically intimidate, but she managed to. He said she told him to do something while he was busy with a previous chore and he replied, "I can't do two things at a ti...(BAM!)" He didn't even get the complaint out of his mouth before she hit him on the head with an implement. He said his mother showed him a revolver once and told him, "if you run, I got somethin that'll catch you." She locked him outside all night one time for coming home late. Cords, belts, switches, any blunt instrument on hand, etc. Shh, remember the show What's Happening? Raj and Dee were in constant fear of being whipped by their mother. That was a comedy angle in the 70s, as was Ralph Cramden saying, "To da MOON, Alice!!" in the 50s. Imagine anyone laughing at either thing today.
I've received that sh from time to time too. I also remember being hit with a belt, buckle end. My take is that that kind of punishment is antiquated in this day and age. Cultural points of view evolve beyond your personal memories of the way things were. I think people often misconceive the past as "good times" or times that were culturally superior to the current standards. I believe that misconception extends to corporal punishment. People who've received it as kids and believe it didn't negatively impact them (or that it actually helped them to tread on the right track to adulthood) don't stop to consider that it may not even be relevant to either thing. It may just mean that you got your ass whipped as a kid.
It's a hard thing for adults who had to experience it to accept that it didn't at least have a positive effect; that it was ultimately done out of love. Hard to accept it was simply done in vain. It's finding a way to absolve your parent of something you now feel is wrong by blaming your child self and construing the act as love. Meanwhile, the same people know that children are helpless and are destined to make mistakes. The two things don't mesh. Blaming yourself as a child for a mistake that got you whipped while at the same time, you would hesitate to blame some other child for a mistake.
I've watched too much Sop's. Melfi was telling Ton' he was blaming himself for his mother trying to have him whacked and he exploded and got in her face because he didn't wanna accept it. |
Severe corporal punishment is child abuse. Sure there might be times that a child is severely beaten and rationalized as an act of love, but I am convinced that the vast majority of time that whenever a child is severely beaten it is due to the parent being incompetent, frustrated or intoxicated. I'm not going to discuss Dwight's parenting skills, but they probably are not as proficient as his ability to procreate. Thus I wouldn't conflate Dwight beating a child with the buckle end of a belt with the emotion of love.
His ass should be in jail if he committed this act. |
Education through violence and fear always work well. Ask any dictator. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
cathy78
Star Player
Joined: 21 Jan 2013
Posts: 1415
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 21, 2014 12:57 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| kray28_ wrote: | | s_habe wrote: | | kray28_ wrote: | LOL...using a belt on your kid is not child abuse. It's much needed..especially with the current generation of delinquent youth.
I am no Dwight fan (as the record will attest)...but is bothers me when other people decide to chime in and tell parents how to discipline their kids.
That's up to the parent. And yes, sometimes corporal punishment is needed.
My wife and I just shake our heads at how kids that my daughter goes to school with open disrespect their parents.
1. One girl told her mom to shut up in front of other parents.
2. Another one decided to call his mom a "(bleep)", and threw a tantrum.
3. Yet another, told her parents "she hated them and to (bleep) off".
These are middle schoolers and no their parents don't spank them. |
What you describe is bad parenting. True. But if these parents used spanking, they'd be even worse.
A good parent manages without spanking. There are other ways to make the child understand what he/she did wrong.
A bad parent may have no idea how to treat the child. And then reverses to spanking. But that does not make the parenting suddenly better. It (almost) never does. A bad parent is still a bad parent and in the next day will make all the same mistakes again.
There is just no excuse to spanking. Shows only lack of communication skills. |
Who are you to tell me what is good/bad parenting? Frankly, you sound quite clueless to the point where I doubt you actually have kids. Kids are extremely difficult to manage...even the well behaved ones. If you think "communication" is the answer to discipline and obedience, you're delusional.
If you do actually have kids, I feel for them, and the horrible wakeup call they're going to get when they go into the real world. |
What a respectful answer. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Hector the Pup
Retired Number
Joined: 25 Jul 2002
Posts: 35946
Location: L.A.
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 21, 2014 1:11 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| kray28_ wrote: | | s_habe wrote: | | kray28_ wrote: | LOL...using a belt on your kid is not child abuse. It's much needed..especially with the current generation of delinquent youth.
I am no Dwight fan (as the record will attest)...but is bothers me when other people decide to chime in and tell parents how to discipline their kids.
That's up to the parent. And yes, sometimes corporal punishment is needed.
My wife and I just shake our heads at how kids that my daughter goes to school with open disrespect their parents.
1. One girl told her mom to shut up in front of other parents.
2. Another one decided to call his mom a "(bleep)", and threw a tantrum.
3. Yet another, told her parents "she hated them and to (bleep) off".
These are middle schoolers and no their parents don't spank them. |
What you describe is bad parenting. True. But if these parents used spanking, they'd be even worse.
A good parent manages without spanking. There are other ways to make the child understand what he/she did wrong.
A bad parent may have no idea how to treat the child. And then reverses to spanking. But that does not make the parenting suddenly better. It (almost) never does. A bad parent is still a bad parent and in the next day will make all the same mistakes again.
There is just no excuse to spanking. Shows only lack of communication skills. |
Who are you to tell me what is good/bad parenting? Frankly, you sound quite clueless to the point where I doubt you actually have kids. Kids are extremely difficult to manage...even the well behaved ones. If you think "communication" is the answer to discipline and obedience, you're delusional.
If you do actually have kids, I feel for them, and the horrible wakeup call they're going to get when they go into the real world. |
Agreed. If a child doesn't learn that mistakes can only be corrected through physical confrontation, then they're going to be eaten up by the world, unlike those who are willing to put their hands on others in the interest of making a point. Those are the ones who go really far.
And, of course, reinforcing that behavior with the simple explanation of 'that's the way we have always done it' is the best explanation, because how people have treated their children and others was perfected centuries ago. Just stay the course. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
jonnybravo
Retired Number
Joined: 21 Sep 2007
Posts: 30680
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 21, 2014 1:19 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| Hector the Pup wrote: | | kray28_ wrote: | | s_habe wrote: | | kray28_ wrote: | LOL...using a belt on your kid is not child abuse. It's much needed..especially with the current generation of delinquent youth.
I am no Dwight fan (as the record will attest)...but is bothers me when other people decide to chime in and tell parents how to discipline their kids.
That's up to the parent. And yes, sometimes corporal punishment is needed.
My wife and I just shake our heads at how kids that my daughter goes to school with open disrespect their parents.
1. One girl told her mom to shut up in front of other parents.
2. Another one decided to call his mom a "(bleep)", and threw a tantrum.
3. Yet another, told her parents "she hated them and to (bleep) off".
These are middle schoolers and no their parents don't spank them. |
What you describe is bad parenting. True. But if these parents used spanking, they'd be even worse.
A good parent manages without spanking. There are other ways to make the child understand what he/she did wrong.
A bad parent may have no idea how to treat the child. And then reverses to spanking. But that does not make the parenting suddenly better. It (almost) never does. A bad parent is still a bad parent and in the next day will make all the same mistakes again.
There is just no excuse to spanking. Shows only lack of communication skills. |
Who are you to tell me what is good/bad parenting? Frankly, you sound quite clueless to the point where I doubt you actually have kids. Kids are extremely difficult to manage...even the well behaved ones. If you think "communication" is the answer to discipline and obedience, you're delusional.
If you do actually have kids, I feel for them, and the horrible wakeup call they're going to get when they go into the real world. |
Agreed. If a child doesn't learn that mistakes can only be corrected through physical confrontation, then they're going to be eaten up by the world, unlike those who are willing to put their hands on others in the interest of making a point. Those are the ones who go really far.
And, of course, reinforcing that behavior with the simple explanation of 'that's the way we have always done it' is the best explanation, because how people have treated their children and others was perfected centuries ago. Just stay the course. |
Well done and +1. 
I'm the second youngest of 9 children. Grew up dirt poor, never beaten. Each and everyone has made it just fine. Some are doing fairly well, others are doing extraordinarily well.
That real world sure showed us.
Oh, and how does anyone know if the unruly kids are the ones that aren't getting their asses whooped. Are their parents carrying the "I don't beat my kids" placard? |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
frijolero01
Franchise Player
Joined: 10 May 2005
Posts: 13324
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 21, 2014 2:49 pm Post subject: |
|
|
With all the of the gadgets and toys that are accessible to kids nowadays, I find taking those away when they give me sass is most effective. To them, it's like losing a limb if I say "give me your phone"
When my 2 year old acts up, I put it in the bank until night time when he asks to watch music videos or Mickey Mouse. "Too bad. Get your butt to sleep"
I think that hurts the most. Kids only want to do what THEY want to do and when you take that away, it affects them .
Sure, I've given my 2 year old a little smack. Just a tiny little smack with the back of my hand just to startle them. I don't think I would ever spank him like my parents did to me.
_________________
Thank you, Kobe. We love you. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
angrypuppy
Retired Number
Joined: 13 Apr 2001
Posts: 32754
|
| Posted: Fri Nov 21, 2014 3:31 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| s_habe wrote: | | kray28_ wrote: | | s_habe wrote: | | kray28_ wrote: | LOL...using a belt on your kid is not child abuse. It's much needed..especially with the current generation of delinquent youth.
I am no Dwight fan (as the record will attest)...but is bothers me when other people decide to chime in and tell parents how to discipline their kids.
That's up to the parent. And yes, sometimes corporal punishment is needed.
My wife and I just shake our heads at how kids that my daughter goes to school with open disrespect their parents.
1. One girl told her mom to shut up in front of other parents.
2. Another one decided to call his mom a "(bleep)", and threw a tantrum.
3. Yet another, told her parents "she hated them and to (bleep) off".
These are middle schoolers and no their parents don't spank them. |
What you describe is bad parenting. True. But if these parents used spanking, they'd be even worse.
A good parent manages without spanking. There are other ways to make the child understand what he/she did wrong.
A bad parent may have no idea how to treat the child. And then reverses to spanking. But that does not make the parenting suddenly better. It (almost) never does. A bad parent is still a bad parent and in the next day will make all the same mistakes again.
There is just no excuse to spanking. Shows only lack of communication skills. |
Who are you to tell me what is good/bad parenting? Frankly, you sound quite clueless to the point where I doubt you actually have kids. Kids are extremely difficult to manage...even the well behaved ones. If you think "communication" is the answer to discipline and obedience, you're delusional.
If you do actually have kids, I feel for them, and the horrible wakeup call they're going to get when they go into the real world. |
Thank you for worrying for my kids! They are doing quite fine.
And a big thank you for answering my arguments with a personal attack!
That serves very nicely as a n example of what I was talking about. Some parents are not able to explain what is the essence of misbehavior to their children and revert to beating instead. There are arguments which may lead to understanding and then there is violence which mostly leads only to fear. The latter is hardly the best way to support any learning at all. |
There's nothing wrong with whipping your child with a belt buckle, though I prefer waterboarding. It prepares my child for the real world. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Kobeling
Sixth Man
Joined: 20 Nov 2014
Posts: 47
|
| Posted: Sat Nov 22, 2014 9:04 am Post subject: |
|
|
| angrypuppy wrote: | | s_habe wrote: | | kray28_ wrote: | | s_habe wrote: | | kray28_ wrote: | LOL...using a belt on your kid is not child abuse. It's much needed..especially with the current generation of delinquent youth.
I am no Dwight fan (as the record will attest)...but is bothers me when other people decide to chime in and tell parents how to discipline their kids.
That's up to the parent. And yes, sometimes corporal punishment is needed.
My wife and I just shake our heads at how kids that my daughter goes to school with open disrespect their parents.
1. One girl told her mom to shut up in front of other parents.
2. Another one decided to call his mom a "(bleep)", and threw a tantrum.
3. Yet another, told her parents "she hated them and to (bleep) off".
These are middle schoolers and no their parents don't spank them. |
What you describe is bad parenting. True. But if these parents used spanking, they'd be even worse.
A good parent manages without spanking. There are other ways to make the child understand what he/she did wrong.
A bad parent may have no idea how to treat the child. And then reverses to spanking. But that does not make the parenting suddenly better. It (almost) never does. A bad parent is still a bad parent and in the next day will make all the same mistakes again.
There is just no excuse to spanking. Shows only lack of communication skills. |
Who are you to tell me what is good/bad parenting? Frankly, you sound quite clueless to the point where I doubt you actually have kids. Kids are extremely difficult to manage...even the well behaved ones. If you think "communication" is the answer to discipline and obedience, you're delusional.
If you do actually have kids, I feel for them, and the horrible wakeup call they're going to get when they go into the real world. |
Thank you for worrying for my kids! They are doing quite fine.
And a big thank you for answering my arguments with a personal attack!
That serves very nicely as a n example of what I was talking about. Some parents are not able to explain what is the essence of misbehavior to their children and revert to beating instead. There are arguments which may lead to understanding and then there is violence which mostly leads only to fear. The latter is hardly the best way to support any learning at all. |
There's nothing wrong with whipping your child with a belt buckle, though I prefer waterboarding. It prepares my child for the real world. |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
|
|
