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RCS926 Franchise Player
Joined: 05 Nov 2003 Posts: 16824
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 11:08 am Post subject: |
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jodeke wrote: | I'm surprised. Derek struck me as a staunch Christian. There must be a deep rooted reason for the divorce.
Did his family move the NYC with him? |
Sadly, the divorce rate among Christians mirrors that of the general population as a whole. That shouldn't be the case, but it is. |
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RCS926 Franchise Player
Joined: 05 Nov 2003 Posts: 16824
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 11:09 am Post subject: |
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CandyCanes wrote: | RCS926 wrote: | vanexelent wrote: | 24 wrote: | She refused to toe the line. |
You're fishing for compliments here. |
Perhaps 24 was ALSO referring to the fact that Fish was the king of the toe on the line 2 pointer. |
*Whoosh* |
I can't be the only one who saw the double meaning in 24's post, can I? |
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kwase Star Player
Joined: 21 Mar 2008 Posts: 3069
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 12:17 pm Post subject: |
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CBaller8 wrote: | kwase wrote: | I find it kind of interesting the he was the one who filed. Man, those two always felt like a strong couple to me...but then again marriage aint nothing more than a crap shoot at best. |
Not surprised based on what I was hearing about her back when they first got married. I believe she also has some kids with Marshall Faulk? |
It's funny you say that because I have a friend that used to play football at SDSU with Faulk, and there was talk back in the day about a chick that was dating a player on the team...but when Faulk showed interest in her she dumped the dude like a bad of rocks. Everybody on the team starting clowning the guy because of it, but at the same time everybody labeled her a gold-digger because everyone knew that Faulk was going to the NFL and it was the only reason she went for him. I wonder if this is Fisher's soon to be ex-wife. I can't wait to talk to my boy to confirm. If so, it would make alot of sense as to why he's getting a divorce. I kind of feel for athletes and men with alot of money...most of them will never find true love because most women are designed to do one thing and that's seperate you from your hard earned cash! |
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Lakers95 Franchise Player
Joined: 19 Dec 2011 Posts: 20880 Location: Southern California
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 1:10 pm Post subject: |
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I bet douchebag Jazz fans are pleased. |
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CBaller8 Franchise Player
Joined: 17 Feb 2002 Posts: 14876 Location: Reseda, CA
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 1:21 pm Post subject: |
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kwase wrote: | CBaller8 wrote: | kwase wrote: | I find it kind of interesting the he was the one who filed. Man, those two always felt like a strong couple to me...but then again marriage aint nothing more than a crap shoot at best. |
Not surprised based on what I was hearing about her back when they first got married. I believe she also has some kids with Marshall Faulk? |
It's funny you say that because I have a friend that used to play football at SDSU with Faulk, and there was talk back in the day about a chick that was dating a player on the team...but when Faulk showed interest in her she dumped the dude like a bad of rocks. Everybody on the team starting clowning the guy because of it, but at the same time everybody labeled her a gold-digger because everyone knew that Faulk was going to the NFL and it was the only reason she went for him. I wonder if this is Fisher's soon to be ex-wife. I can't wait to talk to my boy to confirm. If so, it would make alot of sense as to why he's getting a divorce. I kind of feel for athletes and men with alot of money...most of them will never find true love because most women are designed to do one thing and that's seperate you from your hard earned cash! |
Yep, the word was that DFish was making a big mistake. |
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Triangle_Offense Star Player
Joined: 17 Jun 2009 Posts: 2063 Location: AZ
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 1:43 pm Post subject: |
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kwase wrote: | CBaller8 wrote: | kwase wrote: | I find it kind of interesting the he was the one who filed. Man, those two always felt like a strong couple to me...but then again marriage aint nothing more than a crap shoot at best. |
Not surprised based on what I was hearing about her back when they first got married. I believe she also has some kids with Marshall Faulk? |
It's funny you say that because I have a friend that used to play football at SDSU with Faulk, and there was talk back in the day about a chick that was dating a player on the team...but when Faulk showed interest in her she dumped the dude like a bad of rocks. Everybody on the team starting clowning the guy because of it, but at the same time everybody labeled her a gold-digger because everyone knew that Faulk was going to the NFL and it was the only reason she went for him. I wonder if this is Fisher's soon to be ex-wife. I can't wait to talk to my boy to confirm. If so, it would make alot of sense as to why he's getting a divorce. I kind of feel for athletes and men with alot of money...most of them will never find true love because most women are designed to do one thing and that's seperate you from your hard earned cash! |
She wasn't shooting in the gym with Fish, that's for sure |
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KobeBryantCliffordBrown Star Player
Joined: 28 Apr 2008 Posts: 6429
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 3:24 pm Post subject: |
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LAKERSCMXCIX wrote: | KobeBryantCliffordBrown wrote: | Just dropped a notch in my book. When you have kids, it ain't just about you anymore. |
I take it you don't have kids or an ex
I've been a single father since my kid was born. If his mom and I were together my son would have witnessed many fights screaming matches and insults thrown at each other. The best thing for him was that we broke up. She's a great mom however just lousy lazy wife. My ex and I are civil and we always make it about our son when it's her weekend or mine. I never insult her in front of him always spoke highly of her in front of him and include her on anything mother father and son related. We function as a family and that what counts. My son is happy. And a has strong mind |
You've got me there. _________________ “It took many years of vomiting up all the filth I’d been taught about myself, and half-believed, before I was able to walk on the earth as though I had a right to be here.”
― James Baldwin, Collected Essays |
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KobeBryantCliffordBrown Star Player
Joined: 28 Apr 2008 Posts: 6429
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 3:30 pm Post subject: |
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angrypuppy wrote: | KobeBryantCliffordBrown wrote: | Just dropped a notch in my book. When you have kids, it ain't just about you anymore. |
I agree with your POV, though Fish doesn't drop a notch in my book. It does take remarkable emotional maturity for both parents to keep the domestic scene tranquil which is necessary when kids are involved. Many years ago I dated a girl whose parents divorced immediately after he high school graduation (she was the youngest of their two offspring). She felt victimized and angered at her parents. I presented the heartfelt counterpoint, that her parents were heroes as they delayed their divorce for X years. They sacrificed so that their children would benefit from being raised in a two parent household. |
Nice that you pointed that out to her. People are so into their personal happiness. But when you have kids, then, they need to come first. And most marriages could be made fairly happy with counseling and effort. Instead, people just decide what they think will make them happy. I'll never forgive my ex for breaking apart my family. And every time one of my daughters gets that look or breaks out into tears because they have to change over-we share custody completely-it tears my heart apart and lowers my opinion of my ex even further. She was a whining quitter and we could have made it work. But my children suffer because she took the easy way out. _________________ “It took many years of vomiting up all the filth I’d been taught about myself, and half-believed, before I was able to walk on the earth as though I had a right to be here.”
― James Baldwin, Collected Essays |
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KobeBryantCliffordBrown Star Player
Joined: 28 Apr 2008 Posts: 6429
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 3:31 pm Post subject: |
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Reflexx wrote: | KobeBryantCliffordBrown wrote: | Just dropped a notch in my book. When you have kids, it ain't just about you anymore. |
I'm of the same mindset as you.
I completely understand why some people divorce sometimes. I just hold someone in a little higher regard when they stay together through thick and thin for the sake of the kids. I don't necessarily drop divorced people with kids down a notch. It's just the ones that stay together get extra points.
In that, I mean that the big fights and things that parents feel would hurt the kids don't really need to happen when your #1 priority is the kids. You work it out and force yourself to respect each other and the differences because you've completely dedicated your life to the benefit of the children.
In the short term it's self sacrifice. In the long term it also leads to a stronger marriage and greater understanding and deeper love for your spouse.
That said, it's something that both spouses have to be 100% committed to. If one of them is only 90% committed, it doesn't work. |
Well said. _________________ “It took many years of vomiting up all the filth I’d been taught about myself, and half-believed, before I was able to walk on the earth as though I had a right to be here.”
― James Baldwin, Collected Essays |
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Basketball Fan Franchise Player
Joined: 03 Feb 2004 Posts: 24761
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 3:51 pm Post subject: |
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CBaller8 wrote: | kwase wrote: | I find it kind of interesting the he was the one who filed. Man, those two always felt like a strong couple to me...but then again marriage aint nothing more than a crap shoot at best. |
Not surprised based on what I was hearing about her back when they first got married. I believe she also has some kids with Marshall Faulk? |
Yes she does a son looks exactly like him also plays football an RB too (he should be in college by now) |
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eureca Franchise Player
Joined: 18 Jan 2004 Posts: 15824
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 4:27 pm Post subject: |
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kaoss128 wrote: | KobeBryantCliffordBrown wrote: | Just dropped a notch in my book. When you have kids, it ain't just about you anymore. |
Staying together in an unhappy marriage is not what's best for the kids. |
I definitely see that point. My parents stayed together and I would not call my childhood a happy childhood to put it lightly. At the same time we barely got by financially so a divorce probably would have been tough in that regard. Obviously that is not a factor for Derek and his wife.
A relative of mines has kids and she broke up with the father a while ago. The kids definitely a had a rough time adjusting to it for a while. They thankfully seem to be doing better about it now at least from what I see.
I personally don't look down on people with kids who get divorced. The kids will likely be hurt emotionally either way. I am left wishing my parents got divorced when I was a kid. And kids of divorce wish for the opposite. |
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Wilt LG Contributor
Joined: 29 Dec 2002 Posts: 13727
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 5:30 pm Post subject: |
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RCS926 wrote: | jodeke wrote: | I'm surprised. Derek struck me as a staunch Christian. There must be a deep rooted reason for the divorce.
Did his family move the NYC with him? |
Sadly, the divorce rate among Christians mirrors that of the general population as a whole. That shouldn't be the case, but it is. |
Devout Christians tend to disapprove of prolonged dating and sex outside of marriage. Thus, many Christians marry young without knowing the other person very well. That type of marriage doesn't start off on the right foot and is more likely to end in divorce eventually. That partly explains the relatively high divorce rates in the South, the most religious part of the country, as opposed to the low rates in, for instance, Massachusetts. _________________ ¡Hala Madrid! |
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KobeBryantCliffordBrown Star Player
Joined: 28 Apr 2008 Posts: 6429
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OregonLakerGuy Franchise Player
Joined: 23 Feb 2005 Posts: 13207 Location: Oregon
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 6:30 pm Post subject: |
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I learned a long time ago that it is impossible to fairly judge these things from outside of the relationship. |
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Treble Clef Franchise Player
Joined: 20 Nov 2012 Posts: 23903
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 6:55 pm Post subject: |
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kwase wrote: | I find it kind of interesting the he was the one who filed. Man, those two always felt like a strong couple to me...but then again marriage aint nothing more than a crap shoot at best. |
Well Derek is also the type who would be sure to walk around smiling with her in public even if things were rocky. He has always had those politician qualities.
Looking back, I remember him leaving the Mavs a few years ago and citing needing to be close to his family yet he signed with OKC a few months later and that was just as far. Then he takes a coaching job across the country? Maybe things were bad because he wasnt home enough? Or maybe he was going far away from home because things weren't good? |
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doughboy90650 Franchise Player
Joined: 20 Apr 2006 Posts: 15294 Location: Southern California
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2015 7:44 pm Post subject: |
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KobeBryantCliffordBrown wrote: | http://www.yourtango.com/experts/michele-weiner-davis/got-kids-stay-married-its-simple-expert |
It's not that simple. Kids sense when something's not right. How come mom and pops don't talk and when they do talk, how come they scream and argue? It all depends on the situation. Are they supposed to stay married for the kids if he beats her?
Do you stay married and date others on the side? The kids will feel it either way but I don't think you stay married with someone who has fallen out of love with you. |
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RCS926 Franchise Player
Joined: 05 Nov 2003 Posts: 16824
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Posted: Fri Mar 20, 2015 8:17 am Post subject: |
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Wilt wrote: | RCS926 wrote: | jodeke wrote: | I'm surprised. Derek struck me as a staunch Christian. There must be a deep rooted reason for the divorce.
Did his family move the NYC with him? |
Sadly, the divorce rate among Christians mirrors that of the general population as a whole. That shouldn't be the case, but it is. |
Devout Christians tend to disapprove of prolonged dating and sex outside of marriage. Thus, many Christians marry young without knowing the other person very well. That type of marriage doesn't start off on the right foot and is more likely to end in divorce eventually. That partly explains the relatively high divorce rates in the South, the most religious part of the country, as opposed to the low rates in, for instance, Massachusetts. |
I can certainly see that being a reason for the high divorce rate. |
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LakesGnrLake Star Player
Joined: 07 Apr 2011 Posts: 1293
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Posted: Fri Mar 20, 2015 9:22 am Post subject: |
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doughboy90650 wrote: | KobeBryantCliffordBrown wrote: | http://www.yourtango.com/experts/michele-weiner-davis/got-kids-stay-married-its-simple-expert |
It's not that simple. Kids sense when something's not right. How come mom and pops don't talk and when they do talk, how come they scream and argue? It all depends on the situation. Are they supposed to stay married for the kids if he beats her?
Do you stay married and date others on the side? The kids will feel it either way but I don't think you stay married with someone who has fallen out of love with you. |
The fact of the matter is that if the parents are not happy in their marriage the children suffer. Whether this be because parents are constantly fighting or they just don't like each other and can't agree on how to manage their children. Children who grow up in dysfunctional homes end up being socially incompetent in some degree. It may not even be by much but it still does effect them tremendously. In the worst case a child may never learn "how to love" because they never saw it from their parents and at best they realize their parents don't love each other and have to live with that knowledge. |
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defense Retired Number
Joined: 12 Jan 2010 Posts: 39451
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Posted: Fri Mar 20, 2015 11:43 am Post subject: |
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Topic a little too hard core for me. Gonna go back to bashing Ryan Kelly. |
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Don Draper Retired Number
Joined: 21 Feb 2008 Posts: 28432 Location: LA --> Bay Area
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Posted: Fri Mar 20, 2015 12:47 pm Post subject: |
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Fish is still a pretty young dude. He probably has thousands of women hitting on him in NYC, no surprise he called it quits if his marriage wasn't perfect to begin with. |
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Laker_Town Retired Number
Joined: 26 Jun 2006 Posts: 25604
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Posted: Sat Mar 21, 2015 8:13 am Post subject: |
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Good luck to them all. It is not easy.
The only way fisher would drop a notch for me, is if he'd become a dead beat dad...
Something I don't expect from him. |
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KobeBryantCliffordBrown Star Player
Joined: 28 Apr 2008 Posts: 6429
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Posted: Sat Mar 21, 2015 11:55 am Post subject: |
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frijolero01 wrote: | KobeBryantCliffordBrown wrote: | Just dropped a notch in my book. When you have kids, it ain't just about you anymore. |
You shouldn't have to stay married just because you have kids. You know that can make things worse? Sometimes people are better and better to their kids when they're not together. Having both parents living in the same house is not the most important thing to a child. |
There is no such thing as "just because you have kids." And the opening line sounds like selfish, immature childish whining. You put on your grown up pants, find out how to make each other happy or at least content and keep your family together. _________________ “It took many years of vomiting up all the filth I’d been taught about myself, and half-believed, before I was able to walk on the earth as though I had a right to be here.”
― James Baldwin, Collected Essays |
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22 Franchise Player
Joined: 05 Apr 2013 Posts: 17063
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Posted: Mon Mar 23, 2015 10:02 am Post subject: |
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RCS926 wrote: | Wilt wrote: | RCS926 wrote: | jodeke wrote: | I'm surprised. Derek struck me as a staunch Christian. There must be a deep rooted reason for the divorce.
Did his family move the NYC with him? |
Sadly, the divorce rate among Christians mirrors that of the general population as a whole. That shouldn't be the case, but it is. |
Devout Christians tend to disapprove of prolonged dating and sex outside of marriage. Thus, many Christians marry young without knowing the other person very well. That type of marriage doesn't start off on the right foot and is more likely to end in divorce eventually. That partly explains the relatively high divorce rates in the South, the most religious part of the country, as opposed to the low rates in, for instance, Massachusetts. |
I can certainly see that being a reason for the high divorce rate. |
a more prevalent reason is that most people who "check the box" or go to church regularly aren't really Christian in anything other than label. Unfortunately many people who claim Christianity don't take the time to truly learn or listen to what God says about marriage. And then they wonder why they face the problems they do. It's sad.
I'm not trying to jump on you Wilt, but the bolded in your post would be something that would be a misconception if a Christian were to follow that principle. No where can a verse or doctrine based on that principle be found in the Bible |
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yinoma2001 Retired Number
Joined: 19 Jun 2010 Posts: 119487
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Posted: Mon Mar 23, 2015 10:15 am Post subject: |
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Wilt wrote: | RCS926 wrote: | jodeke wrote: | I'm surprised. Derek struck me as a staunch Christian. There must be a deep rooted reason for the divorce.
Did his family move the NYC with him? |
Sadly, the divorce rate among Christians mirrors that of the general population as a whole. That shouldn't be the case, but it is. |
Devout Christians tend to disapprove of prolonged dating and sex outside of marriage. Thus, many Christians marry young without knowing the other person very well. That type of marriage doesn't start off on the right foot and is more likely to end in divorce eventually. That partly explains the relatively high divorce rates in the South, the most religious part of the country, as opposed to the low rates in, for instance, Massachusetts. |
A bit of a broad stroke here. I get what angle you're coming from, but I think it's a bit much to lump all Christians together. It may also be a reflection of education levels, income disparity, etc. in the South as opposed to say a Christian living in Manhattan.
I'd be interested to see divorce rates amongst self-identified Christians in Massachusetts. _________________ From 2-10 to the Western Conference Finals |
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angrypuppy Retired Number
Joined: 13 Apr 2001 Posts: 32754
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Posted: Mon Mar 23, 2015 10:19 am Post subject: |
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yinoma2001 wrote: |
I'd be interested to see divorce rates amongst self-identified Christians in Massachusetts. |
It's quite low here in Mass. Any Christian woman who wants a divorce is obviously a witch, and we burn witches. |
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