Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2008 9:46 am Post subject: Give some advice to a youngster on how to move on after a break-up?
I broke up with my girlfriend yesterday I mean I loved her to death. She was very pretty(black/asian with honey brown eyes and the best body in the whole freaking 909 area) she had a great personality until I found out that she was talking to all these other different boys. So I broke it off with her, it was hard because I really liked her but she lied to me so many times, it just seems like she still has a hold on me. I do know that I have to get over her so guys help me out! How can I get over her? (I would go to a strip club but im to young)
Joined: 27 Jun 2005 Posts: 29999 Location: Likely nowhere near you
Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2008 10:00 am Post subject:
Hookers.
Also, she was talking to other guys. Talking, or talking?
And while she may seem great now, especially if you are young it will be really good for you to go out and date other girls to know what you really like and what you really want out of life.
Speaking from personal experience, if I had settled on the first or any of the first few girls I dated (I almost married one of them), I wouldn't have the kick ass life I do now.
But hey, you may want that lifestyle and nothing will ever change your mind about it.
You will meet some girls who are not the prettiest girls in the 909 area code, but simply the prettiest girls in the state, in the country, in the world. Don't limit yourself to just 909. _________________ Courage doesn't always roar.
Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying...'I will try again tomorrow.'
Joined: 03 Nov 2005 Posts: 28461 Location: Chillin on the Delaware.. from the Jersey Side
Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2008 10:03 am Post subject:
Seriously, and not to sound cold, but you are way to young to be hung up on one girl... seriously, you will laugh about this when you are in your 20s...
Also, to put some perspective on this, as you can atest to this: "no matter how hot the girl is, there is atleast one guy out there sick of her ish"
Trust me, if you pulled this girl, you will pull plenty more....
1. How long were you together?
2. When you say "talking to all these other different boys", do you mean she was literally just talking to them? What she flirting?
Based on your previous posts (some of which are rather amusing), I am assuming you are probably in your late “-teens”. Anyhow, I’m sure everyone is going to tell you the same thing. You need to find something constructive to do (or someone ). If I remember correctly, you are a b-ball player. Why not join a rec. league, workout, work on your game etc. Physical activity will help you take your mind off of her, while at the same time being beneficial.
“Time heals all wounds”…”there are other fish in the sea”
DEFINATELY SLEEP WITH HER FRIENDS.... make her feel like absolute crap find out ways to make her clinically depressed... since she young as well you can say these things to her and get away with it..
i really dont recommend this... but since shes cheated on you then its fair game.... shes a whore..... get ova it
Last edited by 999 on Thu Jul 31, 2008 10:21 am; edited 1 time in total
Joined: 21 Nov 2004 Posts: 9657 Location: Chattanooga, TN
Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2008 10:58 am Post subject:
Realize how much money you will save, and go buy yourself something nice. Maybe some good Dodger tickets... _________________ Monta Ellis: "Kobe is #1, I'm #2, LeBron is #3."
Best advice: don't keep in contact with her, you'll need time.
Secondly, if she's lying now she'll do it later. "Fool me once...shame on you, fool me twice...shame on me"
Quote:
Realize how much money you will save, and go buy yourself something nice. Maybe some good Dodger tickets...
^Honestly, this is a good time to splurge(sp?) on yourself. Treat yourself. Again, don't keep in contact, you can't be friends now either. That's the only way to get rid of her hold on you. Worse thing you can do is let a girl string you along, and believe me they will do it. _________________ "It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up."-The Greatest
Patience...your time will come. Right now, she's having her day in the sun.
Things will change as you get older and the attention will shift to you.
Try to keep your distance from her and hold your chin up if she's around. She has nothing to offer you now, but hurt. Staying friends and being in her presence will make it hurt more and all it will do is build up her ego to know that your feeling are hurt.
Nothings wrong with feeling hurt, but let youself know that it won't happen again from her.
a strip club is not going to help you with this one. if you have any sense of discernment, you would take one look at the fake, vapid floozies in front of you and be even more depressed because your ex sounds like a natural beauty with an actual personality.
as far as the break up goes, i assume that you mean "talking to a whole bucnch of other guys" she was being inappropriate with them. (if not, you probably made a big mistake by dumping her beacuse people CAN have platonic friends of the opposite sex). if she was inappropriate with other men while in a relationship with you, it means one of two things
1) she wasn't really that into you.
in this case, it's a good thing you dumped her because you can't force someone to feel something that they don't. maybe she was with you for comfort. whatever. but it takes a (bleep) kind of person to be remain a relationship with someone when they aren't into it. it's just plain mean.
2)she is a classless breezy.
in this case, it's also a good thing you dumped her because you don't want to be with the kind of woman who would act in this way. maybe she is just too young to commit or maybe she is insecure and needs attention from other men to feel good about herself. either way, you don't want to be with someone like this. you sound like a nice kid and you deserve better.
my advice for you is to reevalute how inapproprately she acted. did you get jealous of her male friends without knowing that something shady was happening? if so, GO TO HER and APOLOGIZE. flowers would be a good move in this situation.
if she WAS inappropriate, don't be sneaking into any strip clubs and don't listen to any of these goombas on here and go sleep with her friends. instead, think about the relationship objectively and let yourself feel the pain of the loss. listen to radiohead. watch annie hall. then, do something that distracts you. having a fling with someone else is a fun and effective way to get over someone, but can hurt the other person's feelings if they want more so be cautious with that one.
it takes a long time to get over a love but one day you will notice the clouds have parted. this will happen suddenly. eventually, you will become detached enough to cherish the good times you had but at the same time know objectively that it was not right. not to quote tom hanks in cast away, but you never know what the tide will bring in. there are amazing people out there and you just have to find them...or let them come to you! realize that being single is exciting because anything can happen!
everyone goes through this at some point and OCHO is right. time cures everything. HANG IN THERE!!!!
Joined: 02 May 2005 Posts: 90307 Location: Formerly Known As 24
Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2008 12:20 pm Post subject:
TNLakersFanInLA wrote:
Realize how much money you will save, and go buy yourself something nice. Maybe some good Dodger tickets...
Just make sure it's a game against a team worth watching... _________________ “We must always take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented.” ― Elie Wiesel
Joined: 13 Jan 2002 Posts: 7927 Location: Lake Forest
Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2008 12:41 pm Post subject:
Realize a few things.
1) There will be others, and they will be better in some ways.
2) If there's a reason you can't trust her now, you NEVER will.
3) It sounds like you were "crushing" on her quite a bit. Try to step back and be objective. You're likely maximizing the good and minimizing the bad in the relationship.
4) What you want in a woman at < 20 is vastly different than what you want after about 27. Right now, just have fun trying different relationships out to see the possibilities.
Joined: 30 Oct 2007 Posts: 12609 Location: Not "at all" LMAO!
Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2008 8:11 pm Post subject:
Its just how it is. Fine girls are gonna get hit on constantly. Her heart is either yours or its not. If not, move on and don't bother worrying about it.
And if your feelings are that strong, don't let it drag on and on with her. Don't put yourself thru that. You'll get a new girl, there are plenty of girls to like out there.
Joined: 05 Nov 2005 Posts: 10778 Location: Hoosier Nation
Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 7:55 am Post subject:
I think your best bet is to start wearing nothing but black, get quite a few piercings and tattoos, and start writing dark and deeply disturbing poetry. Heavy use of psychoactive drugs, BTW, are entirely optional. _________________ Not a legend
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). If I remember correctly, you are a b-ball player. Why not join a rec. league, workout, work on your game etc. Physical activity will help you take your mind off of her, while at the same time being beneficial.
